The day I gave birth to our second son, I met a blind lady named Ramsina.  She came to our church for the first and last time that day, and spent the entire afternoon, from the close of service until around 8 pm (when he breathed oxygen for the first time) praying over us.  I couldn’t tell you what she prayed.  I was a little distracted by the contractions, but there was a sense of peace and glory knowing someone was praying over our son, our family, and our journey together during the entire event.

I wasn’t certain if Ramsina could see anything at all, so I asked her.  She told me she was completely blind in the physical sense, yet her physical blindness empowered her to see better than she would have otherwise.  Her physical blindness blinded her to all the distractions in front of her which could have blinded her to the deepest, truest, spiritual realities happening all around.

The older I get, the more I understand what Ramsina taught me (thankfully I didn’t have to lose my eyesight to understand it).  There is a deeper, truer reality I often catch glimpses of, though not in the realm of physical sight.  Sometimes God reminds me He has sent angels to camp around me, and I can almost see them.  Sometimes I remember that there is a spiritual war going on, and ultimately the Lord will always have the victory.  Sometimes I recognize He is nearer than my own skin and will never leave or forsake me, and that I am His beloved and He is mine!

However, sometimes, I get distracted by what I can see.  I get overwhelmed with the battles and duties of life, and I self-medicate by zoning out on my phone, or snacking when I’m not hungry.  I distract myself from whatever is overwhelming me.  When I do this, I am also shielding myself from seeing something truer and more lovely than my eyes can absorb.  I am looking to a mediocre substitute rather than gazing at the Almighty to satiate my longing for peace.

Tonight, I sat under the trees confessing to God that I sometimes feel like I am wasting my time when I am not being “productive”.  I was reminded He didn’t make me to produce.  He made me to commune.  I am confident Ramsina’s blindness made her less productive by human standards, yet she was the sweet saint God sent to pray our son into the world.  I can think of no better act of service for my 21-year old self than to be prayed through the birthing process.  Because of her physical blindness, she wasn’t blinded by judgment towards us for our weird hippie ways, as many others were, or the colorful motorhome we resided in.  Instead, she prayed, uninhibited by sight, for the Lord to smile upon our family.   And He has been answering her prayers for twenty-two years!

Space 2/10/23