I just realized that, when I began writing this book (the one I’ve barely looked at since February), I knew there was too much pride involved, but also that the Lord was going to use the journey to demolish my pride (maybe not all of it, but at least a good bit). Boy, do we need Him to do such miraculous and kind work, because fighting pride with our own prideful heart doesn’t work at all. Along the way, I kept being surprised by that grace, yet there was still this huge part of me that longed for success with it. Part of my desire was holy. I know that I have lived a great redemption story. I have seen the Lord tremendously used the folly of my youth to transform my heart into a rich lover of Him. I’ve seen Him use every bit of suffering in my life for my good and His glory. I wanted to share. But I also kind-of wanted someone to pat me on the back for my gifts (you know the ones we don’t earn or choose, but are just given to us as grace to use and give away), and maybe give me a good book deal. This morning I realized that these past 5 months have abolished all of that. I feel such a sense of urgency in my soul that I don’t even care if I finish and get published. It feels like the world may very well be ending soon, and would I have wasted my last chances to tell the world how very lovely Jesus is, or to encourage the Church as we may be entering into a time of great suffering? That’s the reason I have barely looked at the book, because I am not sure publishing companies will even exist in the near future, especially not for Christians. And I am not sure how much longer I can broadcast about my merciful and glorious God through facebook. And that was the whole point of writing… to tell the world how great and glorious Jesus is!!! So I guess these past 5 months have taught me that the days are short, and not to waste them. They have taught me not to care whether my words are bound by someone else’s approval. They have taught me that we all only have a few breaths, and then comes eternity. It is eternity that matters. All that matters on earth is whether we have received the magnificent blessing of God’s grace through Jesus’ sacrifice. And folks, I can’t tell you how much I don’t care about a book deal when I contrast it with the hope of bringing people to heaven with me when I go. I actually don’t care about anything on this planet when I compare it with Jesus or people’s souls.
Space Welch- July 24th, 2020